Love hurts

It hurts. Love, I mean. 
Love isn't always this beautiful thing that causes happiness; it is capable of great loss and sadness too. 
There are many types of love, all real and powerful and sometimes I think I mix them up and feel all of them at once; that's what makes love so painful for me because any time someone allows me to fall for them in friendship or more, they're allowing me to love them completely. Entirely. 
So if (when) it falls apart, it's like grief. It's like I'm missing a part of my soul, like someone detached a limb from my body. 

I love so deeply and intensely that it hurts because nobody could ever reciprocate it. I don't want to love. But I do, it's probably my strongest asset and my weakest link. 

I can't differentiate between what falling in like and falling in love feels like so unless I trust a person completely I will distance myself. And if I'm ever brave enough to take it to the next step know that you're special because rejection is my biggest fear. Abandonment is where rejection leads to, and I will do anything to avoid it. Even if that means holding on to someone when I know I should let go.