I've had so many difficult experiences in relationships and I am starting to question if I'm the problem. I have never cheated, I'm not some kind of stalker and I definitely don't talk about marriage and babies but somehow I manage to either get ignored or, after a while of things going great get friend-zoned or mugged off for someone 'better.'
I'm sick of reading that girls ignore nice guys. I've never once in my life thought 'this guy treats me like crap, I'll definitely give him my number.'
I date guys who compliment me, do nice things for me, that I can laugh and joke and be myself around. It's only usually after I develop feelings that they change into either controlling a-holes or suddenly I'm not good enough anymore.
I know I'm too forgiving, but I also give people my all. I trust, I care for, and I am loyal.
I'm no comedian but I have a reasonably good sense of humour, and I don't take life too seriously in most cases. I'm passionate, a little opinionated, and have ambition.
Okay, so I'm not ever going to be a model, and my figure could be worked on, but I don't feel I'm asking for too much. I don't expect to fall in love with a millionaire with abs to die for and all the rest. I just want someone who makes me feel good about myself and makes me smile and laugh. Someone I feel I can build a future with; but I find myself doubting each day that this will happen for me.
I'm so afraid to get back out there and be hurt again or made a fool of. I am sooo not the 'every guy is my ex' girl, but no matter what 'type' of guy I date, they always find a way to let me down. And it's got me wondering if I do this; if I am too much or not enough for anyone.
I'm not actively searching for love, and people say it comes when you least expect it; but that could be any time. I don't expect it. Sometimes I barely even let myself hope it.
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