Yesterday I went and saw a friend I met during my time at the Ash Eton Personality Disorder Unit and we had a chat about the good and the not so good, and it was nice to be reminded I'm not alone; we've both come tremendously far and are doing great things, but she struggles too sometimes. We all do, I know that. But it's nice to see someone who went on such an intimate journey with you, tell you not to 'suck it up' but to remind yourself how far you've come and not to sweat the small stuff too much.
I then reconnected with almost everyone I've been ghosting on social media and we hung out, we were silly, we laughed about the little things and we took both flattering and purposely unflattering selfies and it was glorious.
As this was technically yesterday's challenge, I left it blank in homage to the 'social media break' I was having, and the necessity to focus on the important things. Okay, I may have posted a few bomb selfies on Insta of my evening make-up; but it's not often I feel I really look good so I feel like that's allowed..right?
Today I've barely been online because I've been busy with my beautiful family. Having lunch, shopping, chilling (napping,) cooking dinner together.. it's been wonderful. Tomorrow I've more of the same as it's my nan's birthday. We'll all be assembling in the evening to wish her a very happy birthday but as I know she will read this tomorrow I'll add it now;
'A very happy birthday to my biggest supporter and one of my best friends. Words will never express what you mean to me, or how grateful I am to call you family; they truly broke the mould when they made you. I hope you have a blessed day and I look forward to celebrating with you later.'
Despite my struggles, I know how lucky I am to live the life I live. We're nothing without our supporters, whomever they happen to be. I'm truly blessed that I have such a strong and loving family behind me, as well as a handful of true friends who I can always count on. They can't always promise to put a smile on my face or make things feel better; but they can and do promise to always be there to listen and to remind me I'm not alone. They understand that when things are tough I go underground, and they will pop up to say that they're not going to hassle me but they will remind me that they are thinking of me and will do what they can to help; whether it's sending me silly GIFs and memes, or coming to sit up with me at 11pm when nobody is home and I don't feel safe.
The world, when it isn't kicking my behind, is a pretty beautiful place. I'm going to enjoy more of the life I was given tomorrow.. After a much-needed good night's sleep. And for all of you who are down, those of you on the brink of recovery, or anyone feeling like your scars from the journey are something to be ashamed of; this ↓ is for you. You've lived. And my gosh, you're not nearly done living yet.
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